Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
