she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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