Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
