How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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