I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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