That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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