I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
