Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
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