whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
