first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Its about making memories worth repressing
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
