And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
