it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize