She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
