you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
