dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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