I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize