New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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