I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Girls should come with a carfax report
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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