Ambien. No doubt about it.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
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