So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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