porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
