What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
