But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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