He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
