I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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