belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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