everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
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