i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
