Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
