She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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