It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
