My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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