You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
You ate ashes out of my bong
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
