he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize