doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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