we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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