Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
that's an acceptable place to lick
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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