the condom got lost in my hair
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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