the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
