I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
