And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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