what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
