i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Randomize
