Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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