Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
