U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
