Those balls look pretty dangerous.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
