Need sex. Gaining weight.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I want to fling myself into the sun
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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