I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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