just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
