it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
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